Notes On The Keys (Meant Nothing To Me)
by XSilverLiningsX
Summary: [Hurk/Kai, Fairytale AU] All Hurk wanted was to go to the Yule Ball. For the food, of course.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: My new OTP is all Esther's fault. Also, I blame Shrek 2 for getting me into a festive fairytale mood. Enjoy, and happy holidays everyone!**

* * *

Hurk's last memory of his father was when the ailing man was on his death bed and Hurk was just barely more than a boy. Before he had keeled over and died in the finals throes of a dreadful pnuenomia, his last words were, "Be kind to your stepmother and stepsisters, Hurk. It's not their fault."

Sometimes he wishes that it were, especially during the moments when his stepmother clubbed him over the ears for being too slow with the bathwater or tossed him out in the yard to chop firewood in the middle of the night, so he would be justified in blaming them for the death of his father.

Well, maybe just his stepmother. His step-siblings aren't too bad... oh, who was he kidding? The older sister of the pair, Seanna, was just as horrible as her mother; whenever she wasn't tormenting Hurk over some little thing, she was making his life difficult by undoing whatever chores he'd already finished and forcing him to redo it lest he face the wrath of his stepmother.

The younger sister, Nel... she was alright. A bit air-headed and naive, but at least she didn't have the heart nor the will to be like her older sister. Her high-pitched pleas for compassionate mercy meant little, however, to the iron fist of her mother.

After enduring the ire of his wicked stepmother over the many years of his boyhood, Hurk grew strong and tall from the manual labor and learned quickly how to make himself scarce whenever trouble was afoot in the turbulent household. He even managed to persuade the local blacksmith, Ferghus, to take him on as an apprentice; he began saving up gold so one day he'd be able to go off on a one-way trip across the seas to a better place – like Malina, perhaps.

But today was not that day, so here Hurk was, steadily chopping his way through a stack of snowed-over firewood while the rest of the family was eating dinner inside the warm cottage.

Life sure was_ grand _for Hurk. (No, not really.)

The sound of horses clopping down the iced-over cobblestone streets caught his attention, but Hurk continued chopping. Perhaps it was just another tax his stepmother had to pay to the Kingdom, or some such...

A shrill shriek coming from Seanna made him rethink his earlier train of thought. He dropped his axe and ran into the house.

"What happened? Who's hurt?"

"OH MY GODDESS! OH MY – MY GODDESS! EEEK!" Seanna did a weird jig in her patchy dress and twirled a dumbfounded Nel around in a circle as she pranced around. An opened letter was clutched in her hand. "WE'VE BEEN INVITED TO THE YULE BALL!"

Hurk immediately lost interest.

Nel grabbed the paper from her sister's hands and squealed loudly, "Look, it even says that there's going to be cuisines from all over the world! Oooh, and cultural dances! Think of all the pretty dresses~!"

Hurk regained interest. Food? Sign him up! "Let me see that–"

"HURK! GET BACK TO WORK!" Hurk ducked his head and backpedaled away from his stepsisters as his stepmother thundered down the rickety stairs.

"Yess'm." Hurk grumbled and scampered out the back door. He'd take a look at the letter after everyone had gone to sleep...

* * *

Hurk never got the chance to sneak a glance at the letter, seeing as his stepmother sent him on various tasks one after the other the whole night, leaving him with barely enough time for naps inbetween. Not even the following morning, nor the day after that, nor the day after that one, was he able to read the letter.

In short, Hurk's life was utter hell for the next few days; he ran errand after errand for his step-family, gathering dresses and make up and other things that his stepmother wanted in order to prepare his stepsisters for the ball.

He never wanted to see another frilly lace corset ever again, if he could help it.

On the day that the Yule Ball came around, Hurk was practically dead on his feet from exhaustion. It didn't help that the stepmother had made it _very_ clear that he, in no way, shape, or form, was going to attend the ball for _any_ reason because he could embarrass his stepsisters and ruin their chances of winning the hands of either the Princess or the Prince.

Hurk waited until his stepmother's velvet-covered back was turned to stick his tongue out at her. Seanna shoved past him in a frilly glacier-blue dress that Hurk frankly thought was ugly. Nel looked confused as her mother led her out the door.

"Mama, why isn't Hurk coming?"

"Hush now, what have I told you about–"

The door slammed shut, and Hurk was all alone in the cottage. He let out a long sigh before heading over to the backyard garden for a nap now that he actually had time to sleep. When he got to the base of the withered luminary tree that had always sat at the edge of the property, Hurk sat down on the dirt with a heavy thump and leaned back against the rough trunk.

The bushes to his left rustled, and out popped a dirty direwolf puppy with something in his slobbery mouth. Hurk grinned and whistled. "Theo, come here boy!"

Theo the puppy padded over, dropped the drool-covered object in Hurk's lap, and proceeded to smother Hurk's face with slimy dog kisses. Hurk threaded his fingers through the matted fur and let the puppy scramble onto his leg. "Good boy. Now, what's this?"

Hurk held up the cream-colored object: it looked like a fruit, except in an odd shape of a three-dimensional star. "How'd you come across something like this, Theo?"

Theo barked and butted his nose against the fruit. Hurk rolled his eyes. "Alright, I'll share it with you. I wonder what it tastes like..."

The fruit broke apart easily in his hands, but Hurk wasn't prepared for the sudden blinding flash of light that came from it. "What the f–"

"I'M FREE! FINALLY!" Something glittered as it flitted around his head, and Hurk had to rub his eyes to get rid of the myriad of colors behind his eyelids. He had to blink several times to make sure he wasn't hallucinating.

A tiny girl with butterfly wings and a wicked staff landed on his arm, stretching her limbs out in a way that suggested that she hadn't had a good stretch since forever. When the tiny girl-creature noticed Hurk staring, she squealed, flew up to his face, and hugged his nose.

"Thank you so much for freeing me! I've been stuck in there for weeks! Thank you, thank you!"

Hurk held his breath – he didn't want to accidentally inhale the tiny girl or something equally stupid. "You're welcome...?"

"I'm Evie the woodland faerie! Nice to meet you!" Well, at least now he knew what she was.

"I'm Hurk. Nice to meet you, Evie-the-woodland-faerie."

The faerie-girl giggled into her tiny hand.

Theo barked and lazily rolled over in Hurk's lap, demanding a belly rub, and Hurk complied. So much for being a terrifying direwolf pup...

The faerie let go of Hurk's nose and fluttered at his face-level. She peered into his eyes curiously for a moment, before her face crinkled in a cutesy way. "Something's wrong. You seem... sad. Why are you sad?"

Hurk thought to himself that he might as well assume that this faerie-girl was real, because there was no way his imagination was _that_ creative.

"I'm sad 'cause I'm missing all the good food and booze over at the Queen's Yule Ball. I can't go 'cause, y'know." Hurk gestured to his holey and dirt-stained peasant clothes.

The faerie's face brightened up. "Well, I can fix you up real nice! It'd be a thank you gift for saving me!"

Hurk sighed. Saving a faerie girl from a star fruit was one thing, but taking some voodoo black magic from the said faerie girl was a completely different thing. "Nah, it's alright. It's just a – _pfftt_! Ugh!"

"Don't move! Stay still!"

Evie had thrown some powdery golden dust at his face, and some of it had landed in his mouth. It tasted like mud. The faerie flew up above his head and practically conjured a shower of golden dust over him and Theo, much to his dismay. Hurk wiped at his face with his hands, hoping that none of the powder had landed in his eyes.

"Ugh, that stuff had better be washable..." Hurk finished wiping at his eyes and glared at Evie.

The faerie rolled her eyes and pointed at Theo; the dog jumped out of Hurk's lap and ran a few feet out before suddenly glowing brightly. When the light faded, Theo was now a powerfully-built stallion the color of melted chocolate and equipped with a saddle.

"Tadaa!" Evie twirled around the dog-turned-horse, and Theo whinnied and shook his glossy mane.

Hurk stared. "What'd you _do_ to my _dog_?"

"Magic, silly! Now stand up so I can make you look nice!"

Still in disbelief, Hurk stood up and let the faerie wave her staff around. He closed his eyes when he started to glow.

"And... finished! What do you think?"

Hurk blinked the spots from his vision and looked down at his clothes. In place of his rags was a maroon-and-cream colored suit with gold-colored epaulettes, and his worn rawhide boots were now made of softened gnoll leather molded to the shape of his feet. Hurk felt a weight settle on his shoulders and looked up to see Evie magically attaching a flowing cape lined with soft white fur.

"Now, the big finish!" Evie conjured up an ornate mirror and Hurk saw his reflection – or, at least he thought it was his. He was cleaner than he'd ever been in his life, and his unsightly stubble had been trimmed to make him look sharp and ruggedly handsome. His hair was free of grease and dirt and styled in a way that Hurk actually _liked_.

"What's this for?" Hurk flicked the cuff-and-chain earring on his right ear. He didn't get why he needed earrings. Didn't only girls wear them? On the other hand, it _did_ look cool, though.

Evie giggled and flapped a hand at him. "I thought it looked nice on you, and I was right! Now, go on and get. I'm sure there's a lot of food waiting for you at the castle!"

At the mention of food, Hurk's stomach rumbled and he went over to Theo-thedog-turned-horse. "Yeah, I'll go and do that. Thanks for the... thanks for everything, Evie."

The faerie girl waved at him with a cheeky smile. "Just be back by midnight!"

"_Food_!" With that, Hurk spurred Theo into a gallop and headed off in the direction of the castle.

* * *

Hurk left Theo in the care of a starry-eyed stableboy named Ellis and marveled at the beauty of the Royal Castle grounds; the whole place was lit up with candles and orbs of light, the bushes were decorated with chains of rosebuds of every color, and the fountains spewed out clear water that sparkled in the flickering lights.

The reception area on the second floor of the Royal Castle even better, as it was elegantly decorated with a festive winter theme but most importantly _warm_. Hurk made a beeline for the food table, expertly slipping through the crowds. The approving eyes of many of the Ball's attendants followed him across the room, many wondering who exactly was that dashing man in the maroon suit, but Hurk paid none of them any mind because he was so fixated on the long tables laden with finger foods from all over the world.

Not to mention the barrels of ale... once Hurk had sampled his way through all of the foodstuffs (without looking too much like a weirdo) and sated his hunger, he went off to try the open bar.

The spiced rum was so delicious that he sneaked away a full bottle of the stuff. A servant boy holding a large serving-plate of hors d'oeuvre stared at him, but Hurk winked at the boy (who flushed and scurried away) as he slipped past and headed over to one of the empty balconies.

Once outside in the crisp winter air and far away from the humdrum of the other (mostly drunk) guests, Hurk casually leaned against the stone rail hidden in a shadowy corner, took a hefty swig of the spiced rum, and eyed the bottle appreciatively. "Man, this stuff is good."

A throat cleared, and Hurk nearly gave himself whiplash when he startled and turned around and saw a man staring at him impassively. His cheeks flush in embarrassment. "Oh, uh, sorry, I'll... I'll lea–"

"Stay." The young man occupying the shadowy space next to Hurk stands stiffly in his elegant ensemble of purple, white, and gold. Hurk can't help but notice that the other man has the most intense eyes that Hurk's ever seen on a person. "You can... stay."

Hurk takes a long look the man, turns back to look at his bottle of rum, and then back at the man. "Well, in that case, you want some? This stuff is _good_."

The man nods slowly and Hurk hands over the bottle of rum. The man takes a long drink from the bottle and doesn't even blink at the burn when he passes the bottle back.

Hurk's face scrunches up when he takes another gulp of the alcohol. "Damn, man, this rum's pretty strong. Where'd you learn to drink like that?"

"Practice." The man shrugs and leans against the balcony rail, mirroring Hurk's posture.

Hurk grins at the prospect of a new drinking buddy, and the man stares for a moment before awkwardly smiling back (as if he didn't quite remember how smiling worked).

* * *

"–and so the kid ends up landing on his face, bowling over at least two racks of spears and almost squishing the chicken when he finally rolls to a stop!" Hurk's laughing when he finishes his story, and the other man has a fond look on his face as he's quietly laughing. They've moved closer together so that there's less than an inch of space between their arms, and the bottle of spiced rum is empty and lying abandoned on the floor of the balcony.

Hurk runs a hand through his hair, a quirk that often appears while he's gesturing and talking at the same time, but his laughter cuts short when his fingers catch on the cuff-and-chain earring for the umpteenth time.

"You know what, I'm just gonna take this stupid thing off, argh–" Hurk's fingers are too big to unlatch the clasp. Without prompting, the other man moves in close and unhooks the cuff-and-chain earring and holds the piece of jewelry out with a teasing smile. Hurk's momentarily distracted by the other man's long and slender fingers, the kind of fingers that archers usually have.

The man's eyebrows suddenly furrow and he carefully raises up the accessory up to face-level. "It stopped glowing."

"What? It was glowing before?" Hurk takes back to piece of jewelry and lo, and behold, the tiny gem in the earring that Hurk didn't even notice before begins to glow a bright ruby red. He lets the other man hold onto the earring again and the gem stops glowing, fading away within a few seconds. "Weird."

The sudden chime of a clocktower startles Hurk and he leans a little over the railing to see the time: the two hands on the clock are both pointing to twelve. "Oh no."

"What?" The other man leans over the railing as well. "What's wrong?"

"I... I gotta go." Hurk fidgets, his conscience fighting between running out right now and staying for a moment longer. He's starting to panic and babbles nerviously. "Listen, this was really great, I mean– I can't stay, I'm sorry, but I really have to leave right _now–_"

The other man grabs Hurk's chin with one hand and drags him down for a violent kiss. Hurk's hands find themselves on the other man's arm, holding gently. The clock chimes again, the second toll, and they part, although reluctantly.

"I've been wanting to do that all night." The man pushes Hurk back a step and licks his reddened lips. "Go."

Hurk stands stock still, stunned for a moment that he can't really afford to waste, before grinning widely – a charming smile that entirely fits him. "Well, that's the best damn kiss I've ever had."

The clock chimes the third toll.

Hurk runs, slipping between the crowds of people with an ease that makes him seem like he'd done it for most of his life. Within a few moments, he's virtually indistinguishable between the densely packed crowds.

Leaning against the railing, Prince Kai bring his hand up to his face and looks at the cuff-and-chain earring nestled in his hand as if it were a priceless artifact. The gem, previously dull in the darkness, starts to glow a warm crimson in his palm when the clock tower strikes the sixth toll to midnight.


	2. Chapter 2

Hurk makes it halfway back to town when the magic wears off. He jumps off of Theo just as the horse starts to glow and drags the stallion into the woody thicket in time as the light fades. Theo, now a puppy, barks happily and licks Hurk's face when he crouches down with his arms held out. Hurk's now back in his leathery rags, but he's still relatively clean.

"Come on, Theo." Hurk rubs the puppy's ears a few more times before getting back on his feet. "Let's get back before stepmother realizes we've been out."

Hurk sets out on a jog, the puppy racing ahead of him, and he makes it back to the cottage with ample time to scrub his face and hair with some dirt to look appropriately dirty and grabbed the chopping axe. He set to chop some wood for the stove and had gotten a fair amount done when he heard the front door slam open and the shrill harping of his stepmother and stepsisters.

Hurk walked into the cottage and casually placed the axe next to the fireplace. Hurk turns to Nel with a smile on his face, "How was the Ball?"

Seanna wails like a child and stomps over to the kitchen table, kicking up a fuss unbecoming of a young woman. "I didn't even get to see the Prince! No one even knew if he had attended at all! I had to dance with some old coot named Laurys! Eugh!"

"I met Riordan." Nel has a dreamy look on her face and she giggles into her gloved hand, "He was such a gentleman, but he couldn't dance. He tried, though, for me."

The stepmother's fuming as she tears off her powdered wig and throws it at Hurk, who catches it with fumbling fingers. "Well, what are you waiting for, boy? Prepare hot baths for all of us!"

Hurk scurries off to collect the metal tubs and the firewood. Once he's outside in the cold winter air, he allows a small, fleeting, smile to take over his face for a brief moment.

* * *

_Several weeks later._

Hurk's been incredibly busy as of late, sharpening speartips and chainhooks at the Forge while Ferghus toiled over a wicked-looking, custom-ordered longsword for an important person. Ferghus is whistling a merry tune, an old habit his, as the constant noise of metal scraping over metal and the rings of the hammer working over a strong piece of steel fill the smithy.

Ferghus stops whistling for a moment, and Hurk looks up. "Hey, kid, did'ya know that the Royals are coming to visit today? Something 'bout the owner of an earring or whats-it that the Prince's looking for. Err, something like that. You know I'm not much for gossip."

"Hmm." Hurk keeps his face disinterested, but his heart was starting to race nerviously. "Doesn't really mean anything for us, right? Well, besides cleaning up a bit and maybe looking a little less dirty for a few hours."

"Meh. I don't get them Royals." With that, Ferghus continued to whistle his merry tune and the smithy was again filled with only the sounds of hammering and scraping.

"Ferghus!" A young woman, Aislinn if Hurk's memory served correctly, burst into the smithy with a panicked look on her face and out of breath.

"Aislinn! Lass, what's going on?" Ferghus set down his hammer, worry and concern clear on his face.

Aislinn looked over her shoulder fearfully. "There's been sighting of huge army of gnolls coming down the south path! Ah! I need to warn Clodagh and Fenella!"

Hurk got up from his seat, his heart now racing from an entirely different reason. Ferghus reached for the greatsword sitting in the corner of the forge and turned to Hurk, holding the massive sword out like an offering. "I'm getting Aodhan and Marrec from the corn fields. Don't do anything _too_ stupid, kid, but try and hold them off 'till I get reinforcements."

Hurk took the proffered greatsword, the heavy weight comfortable in his strong grip, and followed Ferghus outside, the door to the smithy swinging closed behind them.

* * *

The Prince's Personal Assistant, Lann, sighed and refrained from face-palming. Sometimes, he hated dealing with peasants - and then, he remembered that he technically was one. "Miss, I'm sorry, but there's nothing I can do. We're looking for a man, not your daughters."

The woman made a strangled noise before inclining her head begrudgingly. "Well, then, sir. I have no son. I apologize for this... scene."

The woman was clearly furious beyond measure, but said nothing more. One of the younger girls – her daughters, Lann supposed – a blonde, standing behind her spoke up, "Mama, but what about–"

The woman shushed her, but Lann was pretty sure he knew what the girl was going to say. Impatiently, he bit out, "So, you do, in fact, have a son?"

"... I have a stepson." The woman's sour face was incredibly repulsive. "But he's not the one you want. He didn't even go to the Ball."

Lann threw a glance over his shoulder at the Royal Carriage. He really hoped that this search would end soon, as his Lord, the Prince of Erinn, was _not_ known for his patience.

"Well, I still have my orders. Bring him." Lann idly drummed his fingers on the hilts of his twin swords, but the sound of pounding footsteps made him look over to the road. A middle-aged man, a blacksmith judging from the burns on the man's apron, was sprinting down the road. Once the man reached them, he doubled over on with his hands on his knees, breathing hard. Was there trouble afoot?

Lann took a step forward, worried. "Good sir, what seems to be the matter?"

"Ferghus, what's happening?" The woman looked concerned and her daughters huddled closer behind her.

Ferghus took in a few heaving breaths. "There's... gnolls... big ones... south of here... I need.. to warn..." The man took off again, heading towards the corn fields where some of the men of the town were working in.

Lann turned to the woman and her daughters. "Please, get you and your daughters to a safe place." For once, the woman was cooperative as she hustled her daughters back towards the cottage.

Lann walked over to the carriage and knocked on the door. The flap over the window fluttered a little. "My Lord, there's news of a gnoll raid happening right now. Shall we leave, or...?"

The carriage door creaked open and Prince Kai emerged, squinting at the sunlight and fully equipped with his royal knight armor and dreamwalker longbow. "We stay and fight."

One of the woman's daughters, the darker haired one, swooned ridiculously as she was shuffled into the house by the woman. Lann sighed and unsheathed his twin swords. "Of course, my Lord."


	3. Chapter 3

Blood from the cut over his right eye was streaming down Hurk's face, but he kept swinging his sword through the mass of gnolls, cleaving through a dozen of of the creatures at a time. He was getting tired, but at least the horde had dwindled down to a sixth of its former size once Ferghus, Aodhan, Marrec, Ceara, and Gallagher had fought their way through an ambushed that had flanked them.

Suddenly, a horrible pain came from the back of his shoulder, and Hurk reached over to feel a gnoll archer's arrow grotesquely sticking out. Hefting up his weapon for another swing, Hurk was about to charge forward when another fletched arrow came out from nowhere and nailed the gnoll straight through the face. The creature slumped to the ground, dead.

Hurk continued to charge over anyway, smashing the last of the gnolls. Once he was sure that all the gnolls that had come this way were dead, he ripped out the arrow in his shoulder and held tightly onto the hole to stem the bleeding.

Curious, Hurk turned to see where the other arrow had come from and his eyebrows practically flew to his hairline when he saw who it had belonged to: the same man from the Ball, except dressed in a set of ornate armor emblazened with the crest of the Royal Family and holding a fancy longbow, was looking worriedly at him from a few feet away.

Well. What were the odds?

"You there. What is your name?" The Prince lowered his bow and withdrew the arrow he had nocked, replacing it in his quiver.

"Hurk, my Lord. How may I serve you?" Hurk inclined his head in respect despite how much it made his head spin. The cut over his eye was bleeding profusely, but at least he could still kind of see out of it.

"May I see your hand?" Hurk's eyebrows furrowed. What for?

"Of course, my lord." Hurk held out his hand, and the Prince dropped something in his bloodied palm. Hurk recognized it, as it was the earring chain and cuff that had come with the fancy getup the woodland fairy had magicked upon him last night. The inlaid gem glowed like a beacon in his hold.

Oh.

The Prince's look softened imperceptably. "I knew you looked familiar, scruff or no scruff. Come with me, I will have my physician tend to your wounds."

Speechless with surprise, Hurk followed the Prince, dragging the dead weight of a greatsword behind him. They walked back to the where the carriage – the door held open by a babyfaced young man with two swords sheathed at his sides – was waiting outside of his stepmother's cottage. Before he could clear the last five feet to the carriage, however, his stepmother rushed out holding a broom.

"You ungrateful boy! Where have you been? The hearth still needs cleaning!" Hurk's stepmother froze when she saw the Prince glaring at her. She backed up inside the house slowly, and then slammed the door shut. Hurk's two stepsisters peered curiously through the curtains before being tugged away by their mother.

Prince Kai raised a questioning eyebrow in Hurk's direction.

"She's my stepmother." Hurk shrugged sheepishly and winced when the action pulled at his shoulder wound.

"Not any longer, if I have any say in that." With that, Prince Kai held out his hand to help Hurk into the carriage.

Hurk huffed out a breathless laugh and took the offered hand with a firm grip.

* * *

And so they lived happily ever after... sort of.

Hurk's stepmother and Seanna ended up getting eaten by direwolves sent by faerie Evie and her friend, the druid Karok, after the two women had wandered too close to the faeries' territory. Nel ended up happily marrying that stern-faced nobleman she had danced with at the Ball - Riordan, his name was.

King Keaghan and Queen Tieve ran off on their third honeymoon and left the Kingdom of Erinn under the management of Princess Fiona, who then single-handedly cut down the crime rate by two-thirds by the end of the first week.

The Princess's Lady-In-Waiting, Vella, ended up having a torrid affair with Knight-Captain of the Royal Guard, Gwynn.

The Prince's Personal Assistant, Lann, won the town lottery and made off to Malina several million gold pieces richer. Nobody ever heard from him again.

Ferghus took up the stableboy, Ellis, as his new apprentice seeing as his old one had gone off and gotten married.

Last but not least, Hurk and Prince Kai had a fabulous wedding (after Hurk's wounds healed, which somehow made the man look more dashingly roguish than ever) later on, and Hurk became known as the Royal Consort. Hurk objected to the title and had it amended to receive a Knightly title instead.

_Fin._


	4. Extra Tidbit

"So, want to dance?"

"...No."

"Oh, thank the Goddess. I don't even know how people do it, twirling around like twittering birds like it's nothing. It's much more fun to watch them trip over themselves, yeah?"

"Pass me that wine over there."

"What? This one?"

"Yes."

"Woah, hey, easy on the strong stuff. Are you trying to get drunk or something?"

"Why _else_ are we hiding in this corner for?"

"Well, I can think of another-"

"No."

"Aww."

"...Maybe later."

"...You're such a tease, babe."

"Only for you."


End file.
